How we deal with death

I learned the other week that people of different cultures deal with death differently.  I mean I know that every family has a different way of handling death but it is more eye opening to actually hear other peoples'  ways of grieving or even celebrating.  I do not deal well with death.  In 2006 within almost one month of each other both my grandmother and great grandmother passed away.  I couldn't even imagine what my mom must've went through.  But I was there with her every step of the way.  I wanted to be involve and see my grandmothers as much as possible.  And when I wasn't with them I remember being in my room or just detached from everything else going on.  And during the funeral it was really hard for me as well.  I just find it really hard to be happy or to celebrate someone leaving us.  But I never talked about it with anyone.  There was no outlet for that.  I just had to keep it all to myself, as I'm sure my mom did and everyone else.  That is why I loved sitting in our Banjar the other day and talking about death.  Hearing others' perspectives and ways of dealing with death helped me to see that everyone shares these feelings of sadness, but there are different ways of coping with them.  Some cultures actually celebrate death.  I don't think I could do that, but my dad always jokes about when he dies he wants us to throw a party and not a funeral.  He's always said he wants people drinking and having a good time!  He doesn't want us wasting our time crying over him!  I don't know if I could do that but the theory of it sounds like a great idea.

I think that it was really beneficial to sit and talk about the death of Troy.  It's been a long four years with several deaths here at William and Mary.  I knew going into this school that it was somewhat known for having a high suicide rate.  That's why after the first one I didn't really think much of it because it just went along with the stereotype.  But four suicides later and it is just unbelievably sad.  When I got the email I couldn't believe it.  I was overcome with that feeling of sadness.  I've just never understood why people feel they have to do such a thing.  My dad has always told me that life is not that bad!  If you have people in your life that love you and a roof over your head what is there to be so depressed about that you feel like you can't live anymore?  But I think that it was very special that we sat and talked about Troy.  It made me think about how thankful I am and how I need to appreciate everything that I have in life because you never know when someone you love can be taken away from you.